DEAR TUMBLR PLEASE DONT DELETE OR REPORT ME—this blog is for no one but me and I am not promoting or trying to glorify or romanticize any kind of eating disorder
18 | 5'3 | SW: 135 | CW: 119.2 | GW1: 125 | GW3: 120 | GW4: 115 | GW5: 110 | GW6: 105 | GW7: 100 | UGW: 95
Trying to get back on track after a big binge is so hard!
Me: that’s right it’s okay you’re doing fine sweetie
Me: wow this cake looks good
Me: eat the cake eat it now!
Me: no you fat piece of sh*t don’t you dare
Me: oh well what the hell *eats cake*
Also me 30 minutes later: *looks at thinspo and cries because I’m disgusted with myself*
*stands up and almost passes out*
Me: Maybe I should actually eat something.
Me to me: Uh, no. No you don’t.
Me: Fuck, you’re right.
me: *speaks my mind*
me: i did the wrong thing
me: *doesnt speak my mind*
me: i did the wrong thing
Me: *has coffee for breakfast*
Me: *has 24fl oz. 0 cal rockstar for lunch*
Me: *has strong green tea for dinner*
My fake ass: Why does my chest hurt??? Is it because I’m fat???
im sentimental. i sleep a lot. sometimes i cry a little on public transport. when my friends tell me they love me, i feel as though my heart will burst. i take pictures of nice dogs i see on the street. i notice the changing of the seasons, and i get excited. i like fresh fruit. little things make me happy, and i hope i stay this way.
me: *hasnt eaten in 26 hours* why do i have a headache??
ana: its cause you’re fat
me: damn u right
i had my first day back a school a few weeks ago. throughout this entire summer i’ve lost around 8-9 kg (17.6-19.8 lbs), and literally people i hadn’t talked to in years stopped in the halls to tell me how i’ve lost so much weight.
i cannot describe how i felt when i walked to homeroom and people’s jaws literally dropped at the sight of me, my friends’ eyes widened, and so many people came up and made sure that it was me they were looking at.
my teachers have noticed, they all greeted me with smiles and told me how healthy i look now that i’ve lost the weight.
people looked at me in envy, i got a dozen questions like, “how did you do it?”, “how did you get so skinny?” and i just replied with a shrug and a shy smile.
people noticed me. for the very first time people noticed me.
that, my friends, is what weight loss can do.
you can do it too.
Me: I didn’t even go over my calorie limit but I feel like a fat ass
Ana: then your calorie limit isnt low enough
Me: u right
